Dr. Phil on Fathers & Daughters

I have really grown to love and respect Dr. Phil through the years. I think he is such a smart man who really doesn't care to tell people what he thinks, but is also just really decent and caring. On his show yesterday he was talking to a father about his daughter and it REALLY touched me.  I thought I would share it with you. 

"When a daughter doesn't feel really special to their father they have a hunger for male attention, they have a hunger for male validation and acceptance, and all of the things that usually come from a relationship with the male father figure in their life. That makes her vulnerable to anybody that comes along and tells her what she wants to hear...
...It's about a father that teaches a daughter to value herself. It's about a daughter that wakes up everyday and knows that there's a man in this world that she thinks is 10 feet tall that she respects and looks up to. Who thinks that she is special and valuable.  And because she has that self esteem and self worth she will not let some guy use her body, use her life, use her emotions for his playground or to entertain himself. You're trying to teach her to love herself by feeling loved from you.  And therefore she values herself and says...I am worth more than that and I know that, cause my daddy taught me that."

How amazing it would have been to have had an earthly father feel that way about you. To tell you those things and instill in you those things, and to really make you feel like somebody. To be there for you, as someone you could count on and rely on and put your faith and trust in.  Who would be there for you. To grow up in your formative years under the guidance of a man with this kind of love and stability is such a foreign concept for me. Decades passed without so much as even a phone call from mine. I've never had the luxury of even calling someone 'dad' or 'daddy'.  I think my whole ride through life would have been a much happier one for me if I had. To feel rejected by or not valued by one of your parents, even if the other one is great, is a terrible feeling. It sets you apart from others, others who haven't experienced it. And it leaves an ache inside of you that never really goes away. My father wasn't a mean man or a bad guy, but even if he didn't mean for them to, his choices in life affected me in so many ways. I try to make peace with that whole relationship, since his time on earth ended earlier this year. But when he died, the chance of us ever having a real relationship did too. And that's affected me more than I ever thought possible. 

If you have a daddy that loves you and talks to you on a regular basis and invests his time in knowing you, thank God for him. I would have given anything for that.  I was  blessed with a wonderful mom and stepfather and brother and grandparents and a niece and nephew and aunts and uncles and cousins, etc.  And they have brought more joy to my life than they will ever know. 

Goodnight and God bless. 
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